A Daily Practice to See Your Real Progress
Because Real Growth Happens in the Micro-Moments You're Not Counting
The end of the year here, and I know your inbox is probably flooded with messages about "reflecting on your year" and "setting goals for 2025." But this is a practice I use daily, that has completely changed how I see progress and growth.
While this is something you'll want to make part of your daily routine, with New Year's Eve just around the corner, why not use this moment to start?
What I have noticed is that most of us are missing the real magic when it comes to tracking our progress.
Think about it - when someone asks "How was your day?" we automatically slap on a "good" or "bad" label. And let's be real, that judgment usually comes down to pretty surface-level stuff like did everything go smoothly? Did I check off my to-do list? Did someone compliment me? Was I in a good mood? Did I have energy? Did I catch all the green lights?
But why are we treating our days like Instagram posts, reducing rich, complex experiences into oversimplified labels. We are either just focused on the big highlight reels or constantly judging if we've "done enough" each day.
That tough conversation that built your character? The small habit shift that's rewiring your brain? The uncomfortable growth moment? We often label these as "bad" days, missing the extraordinary transformation happening beneath the surface.
Even on those days we label as "good," our minds still zero in on what's missing - that one unfinished task, the goal we didn't quite hit, the meeting that went sideways, the coffee we spilled, the traffic that made us late.
If you're nodding along, you're not alone in this.
Our brains are literally wired to focus on what’s missing. It's an old survival mechanism that's not serving us so well in modern life.
This is why tracking wins and accomplishments isn't just a feel-good exercise - it's actually a powerful way to work with (instead of against) your brain's natural wiring.
I've built my work around helping people understand they aren't broken, that they're just missing crucial pieces of the puzzle. While my book dives deep into all of this, I love sharing these daily nuggets with you.
So let me walk you through what's really happening under the surface...
1. Your Brain's Negativity Bias
Think of your brain's negativity bias like an overprotective guard dog. It was trained by evolution to constantly scan for threats. Back in the day, this kept us alive by spotting predators and dangers. Today, we have that same mechanism but instead of predators it fixates on unfinished tasks or perceived failures which leaves us little room to celebrate what went right. It has us obsessing over that one email we forgot to send or that awkward moment in the meeting. Our ancient survival instincts are still running the show, just with a modern twist.
2. Your Default Mode Network
Ever notice how your mind loves to replay that one thing that went wrong, even when ten things went right? That's your Default Mode Network doing its thing. It is wired to reflect and prepare, but it often fixates on unresolved issues or negative experiences. It prioritizes problems to keep us alert, but this survival mechanism leaves us feeling stuck in self-criticism and worry. It’s like a mental playlist stuck on “what could’ve been better.”
3. The Productivity Trap
We live in a culture that measures worth by productivity and output. It’s easy to judge your day (or your year) as “good” or “bad” based on how much you checked off your to-do list, rather than how it felt or what you learned. Had a day where you needed to rest? Cue the guilt spiral because somehow we've bought into this idea that if we're not constantly "doing," we're failing. We mislabel rest as being lazy and reinforce the idea that our value lies solely in what we achieve. With this mindset we overlook and miss the little things that actually fuel long-term growth and creativity.
4. The Comparison Game
In a world where everyone's sharing their highlight reel, it's like we're constantly watching everyone else's perfectly edited movie while we're stuck seeing all the messy behind-the-scenes footage of our own life. But when you are busy watching other peoples lives you are missing out on your own character development. You miss all the little wins that build over time and small moments of growth that actually move the needle. You dim your own light when you're too busy looking at how bright others are shining. Your creativity gets stifled, your joy gets muted, and those magical moments that make life worth living slip right by you.
5. Your Inner Critic's Origins
If you’ve ever felt like you’re never “enough,” it’s likely your inner critic speaking. This voice amplifies what you didn’t do and dismisses what you did and keeps you in a cycle of self-judgment. The inner critic often stems from unmet needs during childhood. These were our basic needs for validation, safety, or love (think Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs). When those needs weren’t fully met, we internalized the belief that we had to “do more” or “be better” to earn acceptance. Over time, this belief shaped the critical voice in our minds, which constantly pushes us to achieve while downplaying our accomplishments.
Society doesn’t help the cycle. We are constantly being shown standards and perfectly curated feeds that reward perfection and the amount we are “doing.” It’s as though the inner critic believes that by pointing out your flaws, it’s protecting you from rejection or failure. But in reality, it keeps you stuck in a state of self-doubt and disconnection from your worth.
BUT that is just your mind, being your mind. Your brain is doing exactly what it was designed to do: trying to keep you safe, trying to help you belong, trying to ensure your survival.
The real power comes from understanding how your mind works.
When you see these patterns for what they are - just natural programs running in your brain - you realize you're not broken. You never were. You're just human, with a human brain doing exactly what it was designed to do.
If you don't make the conscious effort to work with these patterns, your brain will default to its factory settings. And you don’t want that. Our automatic programs are optimized for survival, not thriving.
On top of that, we live in a world that profits from keeping us stuck in these patterns, a society that's built around equating success and money with value and worth.
BUT THE REAL TRUTH is ….
Your worth isn’t tied to what you accomplish.
It's time to shift the narrative away from your brain's default "not enough" setting and recognize that life isn't as black and white as our minds want to make it.
We are beautifully complex beings, and every moment of our lives carries more depth and meaning than a simple "good" or "bad" label could ever capture. There's always context we're missing, always growth happening beneath the surface, always more to the story than our achievement-obsessed world wants us to see.
You might label a day as "good" because you finally finished that big project. But what if spending two months completing it wasn't actually the best use of your time? What if that sense of accomplishment from checking it off your list blinded you to the fact that you could have stepped away weeks ago? Sometimes what we label as "productivity" or "following through" is actually keeping us from seeing the bigger picture, that maybe the real growth moment would have been in letting go.
Let me show you how to actually see your growth in a way that matters...
Instead of just listing off external wins like "grew my business" or "got promoted," we're going to dig deeper. Because while those achievements are great, they're just the visible result and a by-product of your internal growth.
Here's how we're going to flip the script:
First, let's capture everything that comes to mind, list all your accomplishments from this year. Big ones, tiny ones, ones that might seem insignificant but felt meaningful to you.
Pour it all out across every area of your life: work, relationships, hobbies, health, personal growth... everything.
But for each accomplishment, we're going to ask:
What did this teach me about myself?
How did I grow through this experience?
What internal strength did I discover or develop?
For example, instead of just noting "I started a morning routine," dig into what that really means:
I carved out a sacred space each morning to connect with myself and set the tone for my day
I learned to put myself first without guilt
I cultivated the self-discipline to establish and honor a routine every morning
This isn't about checking boxes or comparing yourself to others. It's about recognizing your own evolution - the person you're becoming through each experience.
We need to feel these wins in our body, not just register them in our logical brain. When you take a moment to connect your mind and heart by breaking down the real impact of the win and to really sit with each accomplishment - that is how it sticks.
Let me show you how I would use this exercise to break down my year with a few examples so you can start this NOW to review 2024 and then implement it into your daily routine.
Stephanie’s 2024: The Year of Internal Growth, Following My Heart, & Committing to Myself
Started writing long-form content & switched to blogging
Discovered my authentic voice and the courage to share it
Built the discipline to consistently honor my ideas by showing up for them
Left corporate world for full-time entrepreneurship
Found the strength to follow my heart over the comfort of security
Proved to myself that I can create something meaningful from scratch
Learned to trust my expertise and value outside traditional systems
Invested in myself and the knowing of my purpose
Deepened my relationship with receiving and asking for help
Launched a podcast
Stepped into the vulnerability of sharing my voice and personal experiences
Shared the lessons I have learned with the world, knowing even helping one person makes it worthwhile
Embraced imperfect action over waiting for perfect planning
Hosted a retreat
Created a transformative space where others could feel seen, supported, and inspired
Learned to trust my ability to guide, lead, and hold space for meaningful growth
Took my own healing and turned it into a curriculum to help others
Overcame the fear of imperfection, focusing instead on connection and impact
Proved to myself that stepping outside my comfort zone can lead to profound outcomes for myself and others
Wrote a book & found an agent
Allowed myself to write freely without the pressure of perfection
Created the space for myself to structure everything I’ve learned into a digestible, meaningful form
Let go of self-imposed expectations and simply showed up to write and wrote an entire book!
Learned to understand what makes the work I do different, special, and unique in order to sell it
Mastered my Intuition
Discovered and embraced the gift of intuition that we all possess
Dedicated myself to training and refining this skill through practice and trust
Built confidence in listening to my inner wisdom and acting on it
Learned to use my intuition for everything (for myself, my business, and to help others)
Realized I hold all of the power within myself
Pivoted my business MANY times
Developed adaptability and deep trust in my instincts
Learned that "failures" are actually clarity in disguise
Found confidence in saying no to what doesn't align
Learned to walk away
Recognized that my personal growth fuels my professional evolution, allowing both to expand together.
Embraced the natural connection between my inner transformation and the shifts in my business.
Internal work & client success
Proved to myself that growth is possible when you do the work
Learned to walk my talk and trust my own methods
Discovered that my struggles and healing can help others heal too
Notice how each "external" win actually represents profound internal growth? This isn't just a list of things you did - it's evidence of who you've become. Take a moment to really let that sink in. This is the real measure of your year - not just what you accomplished, but how you've evolved as a person.
The income, the book deal, the successful retreat - these are amazing, but they're just the visible results of something much more powerful…. my willingness to grow, to take risks, to trust myself, and to keep showing up even when things got hard.
The practice that I use everyday I call it “The Daily Pulse.”
Every evening, take 5-10 minutes to pulse-check your day. This isn't about judging your day as "good" or "bad" - it's about capturing the full spectrum of your experience.
Track Your Wins (Big and Small)
Note 5-10 accomplishments from today (yes, even tiny ones!)
Include things like "had a difficult conversation I'd been avoiding" or "took a lunch break without guilt"
Remember: making your bed or sending that email you've been procrastinating counts!
Questions you can use to Uncover Your Pulse
Growth & Learning
What did you attempt today, even if it wasn't perfect?
What conversation did you have that challenged you?
What boundary did you set or maintain?
When did you choose yourself today?
What did you say no to that would have been easier to say yes to?
What old pattern did you notice or break today?
Internal Shifts & Awareness
When did you listen to your gut today?
What triggered you and how did you handle it differently?
What emotion did you allow yourself to feel instead of suppress?
When did you pause before reacting?
What did you acknowledge about yourself today?
What story did you choose not to believe today?
Showing Up & Self-Care
What did you do to take care of yourself?
When did you choose rest over productivity?
What did you do that felt aligned with your values?
How were you compassionate with yourself today?
What small moment did you fully appreciate?
Connection & Impact
How did you show up authentically in a relationship today?
What vulnerable truth did you share?
When did you ask for help or support?
How did you impact someone else's day?
How did someone positively impact your day?
What connection did you deepen?
When did you choose courage over comfort?
Remember: Wins aren't just about what you did - they're about how you showed up, what you noticed, and how you grew. Even recognizing a pattern or sitting with an uncomfortable emotion is progress worth celebrating.
This isn't about tracking productivity, it's about noticing your evolution. Some days you'll have big wins to celebrate, others will be full of learning moments. Both are equally valuable in your growth.
As the year comes to a close, give yourself permission to look back with compassion. Focus on the growth, the lessons, and the moments that mattered. Focus on all that you did, not what you didn’t do.
The micro-moments are what make the greatest impact!
With love and gratitude,
Stephanie